Packing It All Up…

As the dark clouds move swiftly through the sky out my living room window and the rain falls with increasing volume on the gazebo on the deck, I can’t help but notice a sense of pathetic fallacy. I’ve been a little storm clouds and rain myself lately.

The sky/my moods…same thing…

It’s the last night in this house. The kids and dogs are all asleep, the fridge is nearly bare, the walls naked, and boxes are in every room. Tomorrow morning the packers will arrive to finish what they began today, packing each of our possessions into a labeled brown box:

Load date: July 4, 2017
Name: Perry
Origin: Kingston
Destination: Halifax

Everything we own will soon be in our minivan or on a truck bound for Eastern Canada.

I was…am…so excited for this new adventure. There are so many things I’m looking forward to: the space, the air, the ocean, the sand, the seafood, the pool, and a very best friend living literally two minutes away. I was so ready for this move.

Until it actually began.

It started with goodbyes at a volunteer meeting I was at in the KMFRC. I got a little teary and tried to push it down. We began eating Moving Meals, you know, the ones where you are eating everything that’s left in the fridge, freezer, and pantry so it doesn’t spill while moving or expire on the way. We went through the house and de-cluttered *AGAIN* to make it easier when we get unpacked. Then, quite quickly it seemed, people were saying goodbye everywhere I went. The school, the drug store, Walmart, it seemed I was always bumping into someone who I might not see again. “Best of luck!”, “Take care!”, “You’ll be missed!” were said but I heard, “Your time is almost up here!”, “Time to leave this all behind!”, “Get ready to start all over again!”.

I’m usually pretty good at making friends. I’m bold, I have a sense of humour, and I’m brave enough to say, “Hey! I have no friends! Can I get your number?” when I first arrived so I know a fair amount of people here. But in addition to that I have made some deep, wonderful, only-other-women-who-have-these-kinds-of-friendships-will-understand kind of friendships. The kind where you spend all day long with them and it doesn’t seem weird. The kind where you call in tears, gulping for air and barely able to say the words, “Can I come over?”. The kind where they bring you flowers to cheer you up when times are tough. The kind you laugh over coffee with while your potty training toddlers pee all over the floor. Again. Friendships where you swear you must have met in a previous life and resent the months you lived so close and never knew each other. Friendships where she’s like a second Mama to your kids, loving them and parenting them as if they were her own. Friendships where you can link proverbial arms to support one another in a difficult lifestyle and relate to each other as only few can.

While it’s a tad difficult to watch your beloved possessions be packed into perfect brown boxes, neatly labeled and not yet scraped and damaged from the move across the country, that feeling is nothing compared to the knowledge that you’re leaving these sacred treasures behind. These friendships are more valuable than almost anything in any of those boxes.

I cannot wrap these friendships up in brown paper.
But I will wrap them in love and gratitude.

I cannot take these women with me.
But I will take the memories we have made together.

I cannot see them on my couch, sipping the coffee I made them as we laugh and talk and cry together.
But I will wish for them new friendships and much more laughter, and I will do my best to stay in touch with them.

I believe that different friends enter our lives for different reasons. There are reason, season, and forever friends. Reason friends enter your life to teach you something. You needed that exact person at that exact time. You learn from them and take these lessons with you as you move forward into other friendships down the road. Season friends likely aren’t going to be with you forever. You are friends with them because of a common interest or phase of life or maybe even simply geography. Usually once you click better with someone else you bless and release these friendships.

But forever friends.
Well, that’s something else.
These are the women who have become your family, your sisters.
They help you to become a better version of yourself just for knowing them.
You know each other deeply and share a rich mutual love and respect for one another.

They are the friends you cry over when you’re getting ready to leave.

This city? It’s beautiful. But many cities are beautiful and I can find beauty anywhere.
This house? We’ve made it our own. A home that’s held us and kept us safe for 2 years. But any house becomes a home when you fill it with your family and your treasures.

But these friends? There will never be anything like them.

I will wrap our friendship in the softest love and place it in my heart forever.
It will never be unpacked, but treasured there and thought of often.

Leaving you is the hardest part of all…

<3 Mel

Leave a Reply